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Why You Keep Attracting the Same Type of Person (2025)

"I keep attracting the same type of person into my life."

Does this sound familiar?

It's not just a coincidence.

Like with all things that happen in our small world, this attraction is connected with the bigger world… the universe… and all of the energy that makes up the universe…

But before we go any further, we must address one topic: affirmations.

Monks have been using affirmations forever (mantras, as they call them in Sanskrit) to program their subconscious.

The use of affirmations involves three components

  1. Concise choice of positive words
  2. Clear visualization
  3. Corresponding feeling

Most people don't do steps two and three.

For example, if you repeat to yourself, "I love apples" your mind knows "I" is referring to yourself, and "love" means you enjoy something a lot, but when you say the word "apples," your mind gets confused. Your mind searches your entire hard drive since the day you were born for all occurrences of the word "apple." Red apples, yellow apples, green apples, Apple Macbook Pro, Apple iPhone, Apple iPad… your mind is trying to figure out what apple you are talking about!

And for this reason, words alone are not enough. You need clear visualization and a corresponding feeling.

Feeling is emotion, and emotion is energy. As Tesla said, "To find the secrets of the universe, think in terms of energy, frequency, and vibration."

Everything in the universe is made up of energy that is vibrating at a certain frequency. Your subconscious is also made up of energy that is vibrating at a certain frequency.

For example, maybe the emotion of anger vibrates at 20 kilohertz. Maybe happiness at 30 kilohertz. These numbers are just made up, but you get the idea.

If you can go into your subconscious, and infuse it with energy that's vibrating at a certain frequency (happiness at 30 kilohertz, for example), you can attract things of a similar frequency (happiness).

Now back to the topic….

Why do you keep attracting the same type of person into your life?

Let's take an example of boy meets girl…

Boy meets girl. Boy dates girl. They have an intimate relationship for two years. They break up.

Six months later, boy starts dating again. Who does he attract into his life? Quite often, a very similar girl. Yes, it might be a different person, but it’s a different person with the same vibration frequency.

Why?

This boy has emotional experiences that are vibrating in his subconscious at the same frequency as the last girl he dated. Yes, they broke up, but those experiences are still vibrating. Now when he starts dating again, who does he attract? A girl with that same frequency.

Energy doesn't know how to discriminate between what's good and what's bad for you, it's just energy. Thus, anything of a similar frequency gets drawn to you.

This pattern repeats itself in many people. Some aren't even aware of the pattern. They just think to themselves, "I keep having these same types of relationships, and they aren't working."

How do we break the pattern?

If you know how the subconscious works (which we now do), and you know how to program it, using affirmations with (1) a concise choice of positive words, (2) clear visualization, and (3) a corresponding feeling, then you can bring into your life any type of person or relationship you want. (A corresponding feeling is the most important component because it's the actual energy that attracts similar energy.)

It seems simple, and it is.

If you want a happy and successful relationship, you can attract a happy and successful relationship into your life. All you need to do is reprogram your vibration frequency using (1) a concise choice of positive words, (2) clear visualization, and (3) a corresponding feeling. Do it on a daily basis for as long as you can.

Of course, you can't just do these daily exercises and never leave your home, expecting that your perfect partner will magically knock on your door. You still need to be proactive in your dating life. You still need to meet different people and go on dates. But now, when you do meet that special person with your newfound, vibrant energy, you will attract that person, and start building your happy and successful relationship together.

Taylor Wade

Taylor is one of the founders of Ambiance Matchmaking. She now dedicates her time to curating content for our community through her podcast and blog. Writing and podcasting is the art of great story-telling. As a relationship writer and editor, she has always sought to capture the reality of the dating experience, full of drama, friction, and joy. The best mind is an open mind, so she specializes in asking questions and approaching a story without preconceptions.

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